What is outercourse?
We all understand sex to be penetration, but that isn’t exactly always the case. Penetrative sex is commonly referred to as intercourse, but if that’s not your bag, there is an alternative! Outercourse is non-penetrative sex. What that means is different for different people, but the most important takeaway is… sex. gets. BETTER. when it isn’t “sex”. Outercourse is one of the most sensual and thrilling ways to make your partner feel good. It can be incredibly intimate while producing some of the most mind-blowing orgasms you’ve ever had… so what are you waiting on to try it?
What it means to different people
First, let’s talk about what outercourse actually means. For some people, outercourse means any sex that doesn’t penetrate the vagina. That means all other holes are fair game. For others, it means that there is no penetration of any orifice. In some cases, this is related to religious beliefs, and for others, it’s simply a matter of personal boundaries. In either case, outercourse is about stimulating the external erogenous zones of your own, or your partner’s body. While mostly used to refer to sex with someone with a vulva, anyone with a body can have outercourse. Orgasm isn’t necessary for it to qualify as outercourse, but why not go for the gold?
What are the types of non-penetrative sex?
Non-penetrative sex can manifest in many ways. For all couples, mutual masturbation is an option, or you can focus on just pleasing each other one at a time. You don’t have to limit yourself to tickling the testicles or plucking the pussy. The ears, neck, and navel area can all be erogenous zones, but the major spots you should be servicing are the nipples. If you titillate the titties the right way – slowly, gradually, and deliberately – you can bring yourself or your partner to the big O.
Use that mouth
Another way to approach this sexy session is with your mouth. Any body part that you can finger, you can also lick, nibble, or kiss your way to bliss. As usual, the wetter the better, and while you can rely on your various natural lubrications, a yummy flavored lube can take any romp from nice to nasty in the best of ways.
One of the most satisfying ways is taking it old school. Whether you call it dry humping or hunching, it’s rubbing your genitals together to the point of blasting off. When kissing, this can be incredibly arousing, even with clothes on. Without clothes, you enter a whole new level of pleasure and restraint.
Vulva to vulva outercourse, or tribbing, allows each partner to stimulate each other clit to clit. Of course, you can always rub your vulva on other parts of their body, like a thigh or knee. Penis to penis rubbing, or the Princeton rub, is just as exciting since it allows the hands to roam while kissing. When rubbing penis to vulva, it can be just as enticing. So much so, in fact, that there is a traditional Rwandan technique called Kunyaza that uses this act to bring vulva owners to gushing orgasms.
Bust out the toy chest
Of course, if you want to take any of these dabbling dalliances to the next level, introduce toys the next time you play. If you are into sensory play, use a glass dildo like the Curved Glass Beaded Dildo. Designed for easy gripping, it can be cooled or heated to maximize play. Should you choose to use it for later, more penetrative sessions, this baby hits the spot – specifically the G-spot and the P-spot.
If you need a bit more stimulation, the Powercocks Girthy Realistic Dildo can be used to stimulate the skin and any erogenous zones. Add a bit of lube and rub it across the genitals without insertion for some high-yield titillation.
There are so many ways to pleasure your partner when penetration isn’t an option. Whether due to physical, mental, or emotional limitations sex doesn’t have to have barriers (other than for safety) so get in there… or don’t.